Today I would like to list some of the pros and cons of staying at home.
Actually, I change my mind! Since I am trying to be less pessimistic, let me list the advantages of living at home AND the advantages of moving out.
- Rent is cheap! If you’re parents do not want you to pay for your stay then you can save up the money you would use for rent and utilities. Save it for the down payment on your first home, save it for spending on college classes, or spend it on pizza delivery and the latest video games (you may even be able to afford to upgrade your head set!)
- The art of compromise. Because when you’re on your own there’s no one to please but yourself (and everyone that you owe money). I imagine that if I lived on my own then I would become accustomed to having my way and develop selfish habits that would otherwise be suppressed if I lived with other people. Living at home offers many opportunities to compromise; what to have for dinner, dealing with different schedules or being reminded to put your shoes away (learning to accommodate others sense of order). Of course, you can also practice compromise if you have roomies!
- Safety. Living with your parents can be somewhat safer then living on your own. When I hear a strange noise in the middle of the night, I know that I am not the only person in the home, meaning; if our house in being invaded by an army of rabid chipmunks then I will not be nearly as outnumbered as if I was on my own. Living on your own can be just as safe as living with your parents depending on your level of maturity. Of course if I was 12 then living on my own wouldn't necessarily be the safest option.
- Accountability. Living at home provides an easy system of accountability. It’s simple to be accountable to your parents and siblings. But if you are out on your own it takes a little more work to set up an accountability system but it is doable.
- Responsibility. This is a bigee. When you have bills that need to be paid, food that needs to be provided, a job to keep and, hopefully, a social life to maintain, it can mature and strengthen you. And stress you out. It all depends on how you react. There are some ways to build responsibility while living at home but, I think, none of them are going to mature you as much as the real thing. Here are some examples: Pay rent (A friend suggested using a fraction. There are seven of us at home, so I could pay 1/7th of the house payment); if you haven’t bought your own car, pay your parents for the use of theirs; help pay for food and help with the cooking, pay for your own clothing, hygiene items and entertainment. Of course, this is small stuff compared to the seriousness of making your own way, but it’s a start and its certainly better then nothing.
- Individuality. Nothing can make you your own person like moving out (whether it’s getting your own place or getting married), you will always be viewed as your parents child until the day you move. There’s a difference between inviting a friends over to your place or inviting them to your parents house. I have a hunch that hospitality on my own would be an entirely different ball of wax. A big, exciting ball of wax!! I look forward to the day that I can offer homemade hospitality to others from my own home. For now, I can try my best to help my parents run their house, host our company etc…
- Spiritual Maturity. Being on your own will provide a true test of your spiritual maturity. Some parents are afraid to 'let their kids go' for this very reason, they'd rather keep their 'child' at home under their watchful eye for fear that at the first glint of freedom that their baby will abandon all sound judgement and live a life on the highway to Hell. But you can't control your child's heart. if they're living an outwardly moral life because they fear you then their heart is just as lost at home as it is in 'the world'.
Your parent’s opinion. My parents don’t want me to move out but maybe your parents see moving out as an important step into your adulthood. When it comes to living with your parents, do your best to keep communication open. If you want to live at home be sure to have their blessing first.
Examine your motives for the option you choose: laziness and irresponsibility are not good reasons to live at home. Running away from family responsibilities is not a reason to move out. What are your reasons for the living situation you have chosen?
Bethany